Category: General

(For a laugh. Thanks Huang for forwarding the following email:)

Who says our English is teruk.? Just see below –

Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-point, effective etc:

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS

Britons: I’m sorry, Sir, but we don’t seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL

Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hello, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY

Britons: Excuse me, I’d like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kew me

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY

Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians:No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION

Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar? Continue reading “British English vs Malaysian English”

May be we need light relief, and here goes:

An Indian boy on his first day at school in the US

It was the first day of school and a new student named Chandrashekhar Subrahmanyam entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said, “Let’s begin by reviewing some American History.

Who said, “Give me Liberty , or give me Death”?

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrashekhar, who had his hand up: “Patrick Henry, 1775” he said.

“Very good!” Who said, “Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?”

Again, no response except from Chandrashekhar.” Abraham Lincoln, 1863″ said Chandrashekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, “Class, you should be ashamed.

Chandrashekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do!”

She heard a loud whisper: “F**k the Indians,”

“Who said that?” she demanded.

Chandrashekhar put his hand up. “General Custer, 1862.”

At that point, a student in the back said, “I’m gonna puke.” Continue reading “An Indian boy on his first day at school in the US”

OOLONG TEA……

A carrot, an egg, and a cup of Oolong tea…You will never look at a cup of Oolong the same way again.

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed Oolong tea. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.

Then she ladled the Oolong out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, “Tell me what you see.” Continue reading “Oolong Tea”